AntoineRJWright.com

Sitting at my desk on Monday
Sipping some Sprite
Making some hay
Thinking of meeting I'm in
Missing it
Waiting for email again
Wanting to be with my ol' girl
Drinking a smoothie
Watching her twirl
But here I am leaving quickly
Wasting time

Ima have to finish this chill later. If you listen closley you can hear the breeze in the background. :)Read More

I just looked down my face and saw a ton of curls coming from my mustache. Since coming back from Vegas, I have not kept it trimmed (the Las Vegas security people took my scissors, but I left Philly with scissors just fine - weird). So it is now growing a bit out of control. It is kinda of weird, but I have that old southern general thing going on with the curls, so I will let them stay a while longer.

In other curly news, I am chilling. There really hasnt been much to write about. I did write my artcile for BargainPDA early this week, and am getting ready for a big one for two weeks from now. I spoke to Kyera last night, and that was a highlight of about 5 minutes. I will have to recharge my phone card this weekend so that I can call her next weekish.

There are a ton of CDs that I want. A few artists whom I know from Philly have come out with Holy Hip Hop CDs and I want to get them. J-Silas is a friend of mine whom I really respect and want to get his. There are about six CDs on my list, and that will keep me busy for a while.

Still waiting on getting a car. I have to find another dealership since the one that I was dealing with has a bad rating from the Better Business Bureau. I know that you have to take everything with a grain of salt, but I am trying for a new car. I would like to have a positive experience if at all possible.

Well, that's all for now. May you be blessed this week and know that there is nothing that God can't do, He just won't do anything. Peace.Read More

It is an early Sunday and I am just watching stories of pedple that took hold of a dream and made life happen. I know that there is more for me than just working. Today I learned that patience manifests itself in each of God's blessings. Just a thought. Things in my life will bless God & others.Read More

Friday; I had the day off yesterday and so today does not feel like a Friday. It feels more like a Tuesday, maybe even some like a Monday. I woke up a few times last night (once from a text message from Kyera in Kenya) but overall, I woke up on time. I need to find something to do tomorrow (probably watch basketball and do some shoe shopping). But Sunday is the day: Eagles and Falcons, Steelers and Patroits. It will be a good day for football. Hopefully the Keystone games (both games are in PA) will end with a Keystone bowl.

In Kenya is is quite warm right now. Currently getting near 80. That is so wrong. I want 80+ weather here.

On the other hand, Trevo is dealing with a 19 degree night and no higher than 53 degress during the day. Even with teh rain that would feel better than the impending snowfall here in DC Metro.

Other than that, I am trying to find a place to live closer to work. It is hard since I do not have many contacts here, nor do I have teh wheels to get around. It is my prayer that I would be able to score wheels and then a place to live not long after. Getting a plan together to do that and more has been my goal. It seems that I have moved out of the area of just getting a scripture and now have to put to practice the issues of scripture that happened in between the Word and the manifestation of the blessing. Of course, I have to work in faith. That is where I am finding the most fun. Somehow, I pray tht I would have/kep balance while maintaining a standard of life that speaks towards the goodness of my Father. Until the weekend is over, or I figure out how to email a post, peace and blessings.Read More

Well, the reason that I haven;t been posting lately is because my laptop is not able to get online. Of course, that leaves work as the time when I am mot likely to post, but things have been really busy here and therefore that hasnt happended as much as I would like.

Kyera is in Kenya. She is very blessed to be there. I can see that for me that the main crux of my time here will be spent getting a budget in line for the next few years (not months as I had been doing), as well as getting more focused in terms of vision. I think that the conversation times that I have had because I have not had my laptop as usable have done well. I also like that I have been able to sleep just a hour more too.

This week is kinda quickly going by. Had Monday off and then I have Thursday off because of the inaguration. Safe to say that I will stay in bed tomorrow. I need to also do some shopping, but other than that, I am just trying to plan and execute.

Many blessings to Jason (who had a successful surgery last week) and Trevor (growing in the mist of war in Iraq). I met a ladi from Brazil the other day and she said that she wants to be an international laywer. It is funny, I did not think of it until that moment, but in some ways, I am being called to reach the world, even though I am not getting out of the country and doing all the fun stuff. There are internationals all around me with whom I can learn from and teach. God has a weird way of doing things.

Final thought: My cousin has a picture of Malcom X, Frederick Douglas, Martin L. King Jr, and Marcus Garvey in the living room. In front of their faces are 8 men who are running towards the finish. When I look at that picture, I think of where I am runnign towards and with whom I am running for. I run this race for my wife-to-be, my children to come, and all those people whom will look back towards this time and want to see a step towards success. I think that when I look back towards those famous men, I see that too. A step. They didnt make everything right, they just gave the generations to come a step less to travel. I want to be the same as they in that respect. Having said that, I wonder what God will do next :) PeaceRead More

From my palm, I just want to say thanks to all those that pray for me. Know that I am growing, and will bless you as you have me.Read More

From my palm, I just want to say thanks to all those that pray for me. Know that I am growing, and will bless you as you have me.Read More

The more that I read of this book, the less that I feel that I have been prepared. I know from my conversations with God in times past that I should not hold the actions of my parents (or myself towards them) against them (or me)...

I started this post at 10 of 10 this morning and it is now 5 after 12 when I am getting back to it. Work = koolbeans.

...They did only what they were taught and knew how to do. I appreciate that, but have to grow and be more than just what I was shown. I have to do things right. Be the kind of man that communicates, instead of waiting until I boil over. I have to be the kind of man who understand prejudices, but doesnt hold them against anyone. Me, I have to be the kind of man who is looking towards the future, running such that my wife and kids see me running and know that...

This thuoght will continue when work is less. What a day!Read More

When I went to Vegas last week, I did not expect for my life to undergo any changes. I expected a good trip, followed by some rest, and then back to work. But, as I live, things continue not to go according to any plans of mine, let alone follow any levels of predictiblity. So it snows in Vegas, rest for the weekend leaves for an argument with family, and I come back to work wondering if and when am I going to move on again.

I have begun reading this book called Tender Warror, and so far, it has challenged me to change my approach at looking at each section of life that I am in. It talked about four pillars of man (king, mentor, warrior, and friend) and as the author described them, I could see where my fears of kingship (in the sense of visionary, provider, and leader) have made the other areas of my life weak. To that end, I am thinking that sometime by the time I finish this book, that I will have to make a declaration of sorts to my family and all concerned parties. I will have to change my approach towards them as it relates to me walking out on vision, rather than just responding to the lack of vision that has been around for a while.

There are other things that I know that I have to do as well, such as apologize for more stuff, and take command of my life/relationship moreso that I have done in the past. I am learning things again that I never knew about and am trying not to hold it against my father or anyone else. I cannot blame the women in my family for doing so much, for it seems that they were pushed into that role due to the lack of stable men. I do not plan to add to that list of unstable men. I have a future family to lead into God's glory. My apporach to life has to reflect that, rather than continue to deflect the future to keep working on the past. That is one area where I commit to change. Hopefully, it will help me to be the man that God has designed all men to be.Read More

Just wanted to say hello and God bless to all from Vegas. It is quite beautiful out here, and aside from the floresent suns at night, things are relaly neat here. I have a sense of the depressive ends from seeing women and men being proposistioned quite often as the sun drops in the sky. But other than that, there is something kool to be said about actually laughing at Bill Gates being inerviewed by Conan O'Brien. I have seen some really kool electronic goodies out here. It would be great if I could see all of it, but I cannot. It is just too big. Oh well, I hope to be able to write up something more a bit later. Peace and blessings to all - Romans 8:38-39Read More

Tonight I made a trip in to Philadelphia. I am on my way to a trade show in Las Vegas and stopping here as Philly is where I will be flying out from. I like that I do not live in Philly any more. I like that I have moved past this part of my life. And yet, when I come back here, signs and the air is different. But my broken family is the same. I am running after the vision God has given me. My mom is going to school, working, and in a relationship that seems to be doing her quite well. My sister is just trying to maintain. Unfortunately, she and mom do not get along, and they live together. I wonder, no, I know that my father died and got some peace. In many ways, he was the peace that held them two from going at each other. On the other hand, I am not around. I refuse to get involved. I dont even want to hear their arguments that never end. There is no respect. No honor. No love. I fear that my sis will die early because of her dishonor to mom. No matter how wrong a parent is in the eyes of a child. It is not a smart thing to take down that mantle of honor. I feel as I have sat and talked with my sis about my relationship with Kyera and where we are going, that my family has fallen apart. We are three people only held together by last names and blood types. I do not know if we will see the day when we will all be able to sit in the same room and masks not be on, anger not be the main course, and love and honor are served not snatched. I feel that I am the cause of this current condition. But, I don't know what to do. I left home to grow up and found that I needed God to grow. I matured in Him and learned where honor and love really needed to come from. I learned to love my family despite my and their faults. When my father passed, I heard God say that I learned all that I could from him at that point, that God would be my father. Even now, that is not a comfort. Some days, I struggle to remeber my father's voice. His picture lies on my website, in a place where only those patient enough with me tend to look. In all of his faults, he held things together. I think, in some ways we were afraid to fall apart while he was here. And when he left we just let everything hang.

I look forward to my life with Kyera and do not want the same thing for my family. I do not want my family to just tolerate each other. Though, I do realize that is something that can happen. I want the love of God to be our seals, our mortar. I do not know how to bring that into my family as we stand. Things now are only in a place where God can and will on His time move.

This website, me doing websites, started as a means to show my father that I was just more than a person who could break stuff. I create with my hands and computer tools to honor him. If there was a way that this could also honor my mom and sis, I would hope they would receive it. I cannot stand my family falling apart. Here, I know I have no control of anything. God does. And all I can do as I leave here on the gifts that God has planned for me is to pray that His will be done, on earth, in our family, as it had been done with His.Read More

It started not like this
It was supposed to be another entry
Yet my hands cannot contain excitement
I want what I cannot have
Yet everything I need has been provided
I am waiting for the window to open
For the office to lose its glass ceiling
Looking for something more than just relationship
I am looking past the Face of God for something more
My perceptions are not the same
And yet my desires have only grown more so
It did not start out like this
And yet I am here wanting more

I guess that this is the way things go
They tell me that I look different
Yet nothing on me has changed
Who knows what next the grace I will receive
Only I know that something soon He brings
I see the way our world is changing
Land and water scrape and the hurt
The heart has even wanted to return
And you and I are closer still
I guess that even now our steps are ordered
And that you will protect us as you know
I guess that the green sweater does go with the yellow shirt
And wrinkles are now accepted as a cause for celebration

This happens to be the part where I say goodnight
Where I walk into the blanket
Where the pillow lands on my head and gives pause to the sounds
Each day
Each hour
Each minute
This moment will never come again
I look forward to this piece of peace
I guess that I too should no longer be left waiting
For the moon shines within my room this night
Leaving me guessing that tomorrow is the day you will fulfill your promise

Labels: poem

Read More